As mentioned in a previous post 2020 was by most standards a rather dreadful year. The dreadfulness obvious enough I needn’t belabor the point. Yet I worked through it, not only psychologically but in the studio. It seems, going through my photos that I painted about six paintings, stitched together a half dozen textile folk, made quite a few of my jumbo paper-dolls and my rather consistent studio practice of daily drawings filled quite a few folios- I fear quantity reigned more frequently than quality at times.
But studio wise, a rather decent year.
I’m sensing, hoping , 2021 might be better yet. I’m feeling a new chapter in my life. We’ve begun the incremental steps to relocating to Chicago, given David’s psychoanalytic practice this requires delicacy and sensitivity , not my general rash readiness to move, obstacles be damned, full steam ahead forward. But given the constraints, I sense one chapter closing and another beginning. We will be in an in-between limbo state for the next two years, my studio, his practice here in LA, we’ll be renting a small apartment in Los Angeles close to the office/studio and once our Little Hermitage has sold purchasing an apartment close to Lake Michigan. We spent the new year downtown this (last) year and feel we’ve a better sense of what feels like home.
But studio wise, I am feeling a new chapter as well. My work in Los Angeles has been frequently bold (its been called tacky) in color, admittedly outrageous at times, overtly sexual initially (its been called pornographic), and frequently a bit smirking (but never intentionally ironic). I’m now feeling an inclination towards less of that. Not sure how this will develop but in clearing out my studio, a pre-spring cleaning, I found myself eagerly tossing out many of my frankly depressing thrift store schmattas I had been using in favor of richer velvets and brocades.
Perhaps an embrace of more “serious” intention is in store for me , a growing sense of confidence, an entitlement to a personal voice, to not fearfully hide behind a smirking mask because , God forbid, I actually take myself and my work seriously. Which I do, but in spite of self doubt so fundamental to my being, I feel I am developing confidence that my voice might, can be, taken seriously and that recognition begins with me. This heretofore has been contrary to my entrenched insecurities.
All that said, a degree of humor will always be present in my work and in my personality; that is my nature as well
In the meantime I am very pleased with this interview with the Verum Ultimum gallery in Portland Oregon. I am honored to have one of my favorite paintings included in Generous Kingdom V, a diverse and exciting collection of work. A great deal of gratitude to founder, owner and curator Jennifer Gillia Cutshall. Please visit the gallery’s website for a complete virtual experience.
The interview follows: